I Have Taken Another Street

It seems that life has given me a second chance to do things right (or at least do things for the right reasons), but this time I have taken a different street.

I have been offered the opportunity to work in New York with the plan of getting a promotion, if everything goes well. Similar situation like my last job where I needed to demonstrate I was ready, and everything was int he hands of one person.

What happened then doesn't matter. The fact is that this time, I have taken another street!

Let me first share with you one of the first thoughts that came to my mind when I started entertaining this decision:

There’s a Hole in my Sidewalk

An Autobiography in Five Short Chapters, by Portia Nelson

Chapter One

I walk down the street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I fall in.

I am lost .... I am helpless. It isn't my fault. It takes forever to find a way out.

Chapter Two

I walk down the street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.

I pretend that I don't see it. I fall in again.

I can't believe I am in this same place. But, it isn't my fault. It still takes a long time to get out.

Chapter Three

I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.

I see it is there. I still fall in ... it's a habit ... but, my eyes are open. I know where I am.

It is my fault. I get out immediately.

Chapter Four

I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I walk around it.

Chapter Five

I walk down another street.

- - - - - -

YES, this time, it’s time for a new street. I don't need to pass by the same one 3 more times. On this new street, I follow my heart and stay where it feels like home. I love California… this is home. And I want to continue building my life here at least for a few years. Career can wait, and New York will always be there. So yes, I am a Californian at heart. I love my sun, looking at the mountains everyday as I drive to work, going for a walk at the beach every possible Sunday, going to Church and Bible Study at OLQA Church, mingling with the LIFT group members, and enjoying my fun team at the office with our silly games, jokes, and contests.

I don’t think 3 years ago I would have even thought of the possibility of saying “no” to a career advancement opportunity. But today, life is good as it is, and I don’t need the title anymore to show that I have value and to feel fulfilled.

This is priceless! And I am thankful for having the opportunity to walk down a different street.

That's the beauty of life. There are many paths and streets. We just need to choose the one our heart and spirit are guiding us towards.

Feasting during Lent!

Lent can be more than a time of fasting; it can be a season of feasting.

We can use Lent to fast from certain things and to feast on others.

Lent is a season in which we can:

Fast from judging others; feast on the Christ Indwelling them.

Fast from emphasis on differences; feast on the unity of all life.

Fast from apparent darkness; feast on the reality of light.

Fast from thoughts of illness; feast on the healing power of God.

Fast from words that pollute; feast on phrases that purify.

Fast from discontent; feast on gratitude.

Fast from anger; feast on patience.

Fast from pessimism; feast on optimism.

Fast from worry; feast on divine order.

Fast from complaining; feast on appreciation.

Fast from negatives; feast on affirmatives.

Fast from unrelenting pressures; feast on unceasing prayer.

Fast from hostility; feast on non-resistance.

Fast from bitterness; feast on forgiveness.

Fast from self-concern; feast on compassion for others.

Fast from personal anxiety; feast on eternal Truth.

Fast from discouragement; feast on hope.

Fast from facts that depress; feast on truths that uplift.

Fast from lethargy; feast on enthusiasm.

Fast from suspicion; feast on truth.

Fast from thoughts that weaken; feast on promises that inspire.

Fast from shadows of sorrow; feast on the sunlight of serenity.

Fast from idle gossip; feast on purposeful silence.

Fast from problems that overwhelm; feast on prayer that undergirds.

- William Arthur Ward

(American author, teacher and pastor, 1921-1994.)

Help Charlie Heal!

Charlie Greenman was born on August 4, 2010. About 12 hours after his delivery, he started having seizures. He had suffered a stroke in utero.

He has become to his family & their friends a living example of humility, love, patience, resilience, and dependence on God. I had the privilege to attend Charlie’s Blessing this past weekend, and Sarah, his mom, gave a few words of gratitude. There is one line that moved me and even more than 24 hours later still makes me cry. Sarah said,

“I’m humbled by him and all of you.”

What amazes me is the peace Sarah portrays. She is staying on course with hope, faith, and thankful for the support of people around her. From this experience that, with no doubt, is difficult and painful, she and her family are experiencing the power of faith and dependence on God (through others).

As she later told me, she feels overwhelmed at times and so vulnerable. It’s from weakness, that we gain strength. It is the love and care of their family, friends and even those they don’t even know that keeps them strong.

And here is a great learning: It is by sharing our feelings and problems with those who love us that we find the support and optimism for life. Sometimes we try too hard to be strong and independence, but God asked us to be humble and depend on Him. It is through the difficult experiences in our life that we seek for that Higher Power that never forgets or abandons us.

I am sure that God has a master plan for The Greenman Family. Charlie will do great things and teach us a lot more!

I want to ask you to please read Charlie’s blog and consider helping his family. Charlie will need the help of many doctors and therapists throughout his life, and the kindness & compassions of all of us could help Sarah & Jack to have a bit more piece of mind financially. Please read his story!

Learn More About Charlie & For Donations

http://charliesfund.blogspot.com/

When in Crisis, ONE Day at a Time!

There are times when we become so overwhelmed with our problems or circumstances. Nothing seems going right, and we feel without strength to keep going and striving.

During these times, the best advice I give to friends is taking "one day at a time, baby!" This allows you to break the problem down into pieces that are easier to digest. The problem then does not seem too big or impossible for you to solve. Just do today what you need to do, and do your best while doing it.

Remember to give thanks for the things you have, the love you have, the people who surround you, and the experiences that have made you the way you are. This will help you gain perspective of what matters in life and remember that you are not alone, but have people who love you and will be there to support and help you.

Also, remember your success stories. I am sure that there have been other tough times in your life when you thought the problem or challenge was too big. And still, you made it! Gain confidence that you have all the skills and strength to get through the tough patch because you have done it before!

Finally, have hope by keeping in mind that it is in weakness that we find strength. As the second letter to the Corinthians says, "We are afflicted in every way, but not constrained; perplexed, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. Therefore, we are not discouraged; rather, although our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this momentary light affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison." (Chapter 4, Verses 8-9, 16-17).

He’s Not That Into You Moments

This audiobook is by far one of the funniest things I have heard, but at the same time it’s so liberating!

It frees us women from over-thinking, playing scenarios, and creating excuses for our fellow men. And more importantly, it takes us back to the good-old-times.

My fellow sisters, love is not complicated. If men are interested, they will seek you. If they are not, they will not. Don’t waste your time and beautiful minds in reading between the lines. Don’t confuse any mundane interaction for a date. If he really wants a date, he will ask you out on a date (point blank!). Honestly, it’s so liberating!

There’s not such thing as, “I wanted to slow it down” or “Let’s take some time off.” Why if everything is moving towards the right direction, will you need to slow down? But then, we creative women go with our fantastic reasoning and think that they may be afraid, etc. If he has fears, would you like to marry a guy afraid to make a move or a decision?

Ultimately, God works in marvelous ways and if he is not "the" one is because God has a better, bigger plan in mind. Remember He is higher than us and have a better perspective and outlook in life. Besides, every experience with our fellow brothers is an opportunity for us to grow and learn for the next experience. And please try hard not to create stories on his frustrated past to excuse him, or spend time thinking on all the “would haves” behind your actions… there’s nothing you could have done different for a different outcome. What was is what is the best.

We are beautiful women, created with the love of God, perfect and complete, so we deserve a man that accepts us as we are and is eager to go for it no matter what (commitment).

P.S. By the way, this applies to every man! Don't create the excuse of "he's a Christian," "we're from different backgrounds so communicate different;" "he had a strong experience as a child." No excuses :-)

Lady of Security

This weekend I was anxious because I couldn’t define whether someone likes me or is interested in me as more than a friend. I was even a bit stressed and obsessed with it. And then remember the great lessons from the book “Lady in Waiting”based on the Bible's book of Ruth.

“Why do women experience difficulty being still and waiting for the man to initiate and develop the relationship?” (Kendall & Jones, p. 94). The answer is insecurity because we center our life on something (marriage) or someone (Our Prince) that can be lost or taken away, instead of having it on God that is permanent. Insecurity makes us cling to a relationship or a man; and as Deepak Chopra says, whatever you cling to, you will lose.

God gives us the choice between His plans and ours. And we for sure have a limited perspective on who or where our prince will be. Only God has all things in view, and we should not set for less than God’s best. And trust me, I know this is hard. You may wonder what you can do to get noticed by that man you like, and the answer is nothing. Don’t pursue him, don’t ignore him, and don’t talk about him to ten carefully chosen friends. Just let God do His work on both of you. That’s the only way we can give them the chance to show us they are interested and they are looking to build a relationship with us.

There’s one thing we can do: “turn the whole business to God” (p. 97). Trust that God has his best intention for you and he will take care of you regardless of your circumstances. Be a women secure in God, not in the need to maneuver or manipulate men to get them, because if you maneuver/manipulate to get them you will have to maneuver/manipulate during the whole relationship.

Source: Kendall, Jackie & Jones, Debby. “Lady in Waiting” Expanded Edition.

From Guilt to Liberation

I was reading the other day my journal and ran into this amazing note about how I felt after my confession.

As Catholic, we are recommended to confess at least twice a year (for Advent & Lent), but I have not been in confession for about 5 years. I may have been afraid, embarrassed or just bought into the belief that I didn’t need to confess to another human being.

But I have been growing a lot in my faith during the past few years, so I decided to go to Confession. In summary, it has been the best confession I have ever had. The setting was in a lawn surrounded by green and an amazing California weather. There were just 2 chairs on the lawn. The priest is from Italian background and so loving and compassionate. As soon as he noticed I was nervous, he knew I hadn’t done it in a long time. He forgot all the formality of the confession process and started a conversation with me.

He was focused on connecting with me, understanding my emotions. He shared with me similar personal challenges he had faced and helped me understand how I can overcome those temptations. He asked me to practice forgiving myself so I can be quick at forgiving others and to practice gratitude so I can let go of my pride. I didn’t get a penance but I got some action steps to practice during the day.

But beyond all, I felt so loved, forgiven and liberated… even people told me that I looked so happy and like with 50 pounds off my back.